Modcloth ain’t sh!t
I’m trying to upgrade my look. I’ve always imagined myself as what I know now is ‘New Black.’
For me in the DMV area, that was that short hair look, fitted suits and attitude. That look started to change for me once I stopped perming my hair and gained about 100lbs since high school–that’s the number I’m sticking to.
So I took a chance and ordered for a website called Modcloth. Modcloth for me was always that store that I looked at and wanted to order from, but never pulled the plug because I wasn’t sure of the sizing, the cost was a little out of range, and I wasn’t sure if I wanted to look like a plus-sized Mary Poppins. But I took the chance; ordered from them and well… the results were dismal.
In my mind, I imagined I would look like one of my style icons here on the worldwide web:
I ordered about $400 worth of items in an attempt to give it my best chance for success. Like, if I ordered enough shit, half of it would half to actually fit and make me look like a snack. Let me break it down for you:
Here are 4 thoughts on Modcloth.com, based mostly on the plus-sized section as it pertains to any natural women with hips, thighs, and a little bit of gut (or butt—both!).
The quality sucks. There is no other way to put this, THE QUALITY SUCKS. I purchased a few shirts and they were all thinly made of cheap ass polyester. Most of the shirts needed to be layered with an undershirt or a camisole which wouldn’t be that big of an issue if it weren’t for the fact that these were sleeveless shirts intended for spring and summer wear. I’m about a 38D, which would be a guess because I mostly buy my bras in a pack. At a 38D, these thin shirts barely give me enough room to bend ova’ to pick up a pencil without feeling that the shirt is gonna rip open.
There was thread, literal thread hanging from these expensive ass shirts. It was the kind of hanging thread that your auntie coworker would find and in an attempt to be helpful, would pull on and the entire structure of the shirt would just melt away. I also purchased several pairs of shoes. Some of which arrived with what looked like hot glue to hold together the straps to the wedge. Glued on jewels and shit. How dreadful.
Let’s be clear, if the quality wasn’t so bad, then the price wouldn’t be a huge issue. I’m a strong believer that you pay for the quality you want. So when I took a chance to purchase these items, I thought to myself
‘…I’m sure this is worth the cost.’
I was mistaken. The only items on that site that may be worth the cost are the name brand shoes. Let me let you in on a little secret here, Modcloth conspicuously hides the names of brands in their advertisement photos so that you have no idea what brand the items are—they’re clever like that. Once they arrive you’ll quickly realize that you spent $79.99 on a pair of Rocket Dog shoes. If you aren’t familiar, those are shoes that once discounted go all the way down to the Rugged Warehouse and Ollies of the world.
The other items you’d expect to spend money on? The jackets? The cardigans? Those are too damn tight to even layer! In fact, let me move to that next.
When I received my order, I cried. I had such high expectations and as a highly emotional self-loather, I cried like somebody stole my bike when these pieces didn’t fit. I got issues with self-image right now so not being able to fit nearly every item I purchased made me feel like the Nutty Professor in those sweatpants. By the time I got to the bottom of the box, I was literally balling and my boyfriend’s all like ‘what? What had happened?’ and I’m all like,
‘Nigga! Do you not see how tight this shirt is? Do you not realize that this shirt should reach my ass but it barely passes my belly button?’
In some cases, I even had to get help to get out of them. There issue with sizing is a universal issue as it pertains to fuller figured women and the lack of standardized sizing. In one store I can fit a 16, in another store, I’m damn near a 22. Why can’t I fit an XL at H&M or 1X at Forever 21. Why must I have to go to a plus-sized corner at Forever 21 where they only showcase sweatpants and Mu-Mu’s on the mannequins?
Needless to say, the most of the items were returned, except for maybe a few items: a pair of glasses, a pencil. The return process went along as expected. I was able to ship them back out in the box I received. You process the return online and then print out a shipping label. By today’s standards, that pretty outdated considering no one has an at home printer anymore, but I’ll take what I can get. They offer you a full return but at the cost of free shipping. If you return for a store credit, then you are offered a $5 bonus credit for shopping. Their tricky little way of keeping you in their back pocket until you’ve spent up all the store credit.
I see you Modcloth.
Once I’d made my return, I made several follow up purchases (and subsequent returns) to Modcloth as I went through the stages of loss every time I ordered:
DENIAL: ‘I’m sure it will loosen up as the day goes along.’
ANGER: ‘This cheap shit!!’
BARGAINING: ‘If only I had ordered from them when I was smaller.’
DEPRESSION: ‘I can’t believe I gained this much weight.’
ACCEPTANCE: ‘Modcloth ain’t shit.’
I haven’t ordered from them since.
*When I got the news that Walmart had acquired Modcloth, I gave this news the sideye. Not because as others have pointed out, it completely goes against what Modcloth has represented for years as a brand; but because it should’ve been there the whole damn time. I’ve purchase Miley Cyrus leggings that were better than Modcloth clothes.